Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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