guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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