Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
