and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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