You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
