yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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