...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
