dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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