i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
