The brown eye won't let me do that either.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize