There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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