There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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