somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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