As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
