Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize