How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
