hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
