I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I checked into jail on foursquare
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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