Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
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