chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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