I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
