it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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