I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
