dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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