I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
