batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize