I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Randomize
