About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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