could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
We had sex on a dog bed..
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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