also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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