tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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