Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
