I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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