Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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