I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
