what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize