Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
