But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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