She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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