i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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