oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize