You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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