This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
