My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
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