I smell stomach acid.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
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