LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
