She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
