I want to stick my p in your. b.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
