their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
