We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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