Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
if only i could text you this smell
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
