Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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